Interview with a Vasilakis

By the intern formerly known as Martin Veres

Here we are. The final frontier of tangible perks. The awe-inspiring summit of Mt. Perkington, if you prefer. This tier is for the real big spenders, the sugar mommas and daddies, the chronically philanthropic. In the pursuit of happiness, these donors choose to give first and ask questions later. Let’s hope they’ve got as much disposable income as Will Smith.

This is the tier where it all comes to a head. $150 and $160 aren’t just generous sums of money that will go a long way towards getting our interns fresh bread, water, and protective gear to fend off marauding ducks – they represent something far more substantial: triple digits. In exchange for this valuable contribution, we offer you our centre’s most feared and valuable asset: Director Rike!

For $160, Rike “The Puppet Master” Krishnabhakdi-Vasilakis will personally discuss your manuscript with you and let you know where you’ve stuffed up. Oh, the disgraces you’ll know! Meetings can take place either at the centre, or over Skype if you’re from further afield. Alternatively, you could try chanting ‘Krish-nab-hak-di’ three times into a mirror at midnight. I dare you.

If a one-on-one session with the master isn’t your cup of tea, for $150 you could have your manuscript assessed by published authors at the centre. Send in 2 poems of 40 lines, or 60 pages of prose, and one of Rike’s inner circle (or perhaps even the master herself) will provide you with some professional feedback to sink your teeth into. 

So jump on Chuffed, have a few drinks to help loosen your inhibitions, and let the soft, murmuring whispers of 'Krish-nab-hak-di' lull you into an altruistic delirium. Ignore the figure at your window. 

That's it, folks. From here on, we'll be updating less frequently about perks (there are still some we've left uncovered, believe it or not), but that doesn't mean we'll go completely dark. Keep your eyes open, and your ears to the ground for our intern profiles - coming soon!

Written by SCWC

Posted on August 15, 2016